Lessons From London

An Interview with Chris Medcalf

Don't go at [ministry] alone. You need spiritual and emotional by involving yourself in a Biblical-based fellowship.

LIA: Why don't you begin by introducing yourself to our readers?

CM: I grew up on a farm just south of Cambridge, England. My parents were Christians, but it wasn't until my early teens that I became aware of God's reality. It was another four years before I had fellowship with other believers. I knew some things weren't right in my life, one of them being my involvement in homosexuality. But I didn't understand God's forgiveness or the power of the Holy Spirit to change ones behavior.

LIA: Was your involvement in homosexuality quite extensive? CM: No, it soon stopped. But then the struggle became internalized for quite a number of years. I became involved in a Christian union at college and then later as a staff worker for the British equivalent in InterVarsity.

LIA: How did you first get involved in homosexual ministry? CM: In the college where I was working, one of the women in the Christian union publicly declared herself lesbian through the school newspaper. The other Christians didn't know how to respond, so I contacted Martin Hallett of "True Freedom Trust" in Liverpool for help in dealing with it. He mentioned a conference he was having the following week. I went to it and for the first time, I heard People openly discussing their homosexual struggles.

At the end of the conference I confessed to Martin my real reason for being there. He encouraged me to join the support group he was leading near my home in Manchester. That was the beginning of openness, admitting to others for the first time that I had a homosexual problem. It forced me to deal with a fear I had of meeting other people who had the same struggles. Within one month of the conference, I met three people in the course of my work who were homosexual. The fear I had was gone, and I was able to share the good news of Christ with them.

LIA: How did that lead to full-time ministry to homosexuals?

CM: That same year the second Exodus Europe conference was held in Britain and I went along at Martin's invitation. I was in my final year of work as a staff worker with InterVarsity, and I wanted a chance to think and pray about my future. During the week, a small group of people interested in seeing a ministry begin in London met together. I joined them, and during the sharing time, it suddenly hit me: "This is it! This is what God wants me to do." I was a bit taken aback, and left the conference feeling it was all a big mistake. I told my Pastor in Manchester about what had happened and also confessed my own past involvement in homosexuality. He was tremendously supportive and encouraged me very much to go ahead with it. A board which had formed to launch the ministry interviewed me and that was also positive. To be better prepared, I accepted an invitation from Frank Worthen to come to Love In Action and train for three months. That was December of 1983. It was helpful to observe a ministry which had functioned in this area of outreach for so many years.

LIA: What happened when you returned to London?

CM: I went with Frank to the third Exodus Europe conference, which was in Switzerland that year (1984). I also got to visit several other European ministries. In August, we got office space offered to us rent free and that's when things really began to take off. We were able to have a phone installed and start advertising regularly.

LIA: How did you build up your clientele?

CM: I was already in touch with a few people from my Student Union days, and we took over the sporadic meeting Martin Hallet had been holding in the London area. As we advertised, inquiries kept coming in. I was surprised at the number of people who responded to such a seemingly insignificant classified ad.

LIA: What were your biggest frustrations?

CM: Money was always a problem in the early days. We would sometimes go two or three months without a salary. Near the end of our first year, I found myself getting swamped. I was working almost every day late into the evening, neglecting fellowship with my church and house group. I wasn't even eating properly and went through a period of illness. I realized how much I needed a balance between work and times for rest and relaxation.

LIA: Sometimes we think that God can't get along without us!

CM: Yes, I had to gain a better view of God's sovereignty. The work didn't depend on me - it was God's work. I had to learn to leave things in His hands. We had some volunteer help for awhile, which helped us catch up. Now I'm alone in the office much of the time. But I want to stress that it hasn't been a "lone ranger" type of operation. I don't think God blesses that approach to ministry. There has always been a committee of people representing various churches who have been behind us. They haven't been directly involved in the work, but have been overseeing it, offering guidance and support. Then there's the support of my home church fellowship. These relationships have been very important to me, making it less likely that I would seek to fulfill my emotional needs through counselees, which I think could otherwise have been a danger.

LIA: What other discouragements have you had to work through?

CM: The first time you get someone who decides to go back to the gay lifestyle can be a difficult time. It's hard not to take it personally: "Where did I go wrong? What could I have done differently?" It can deeply affect you, if it's someone you've come to love and really care about. But each of us has to make his own decisions, we can't do that for other people. What helps me is a larger view of God's grace. He is faithful; He's not going to give up on that person.

The two-year mark was a difficult time for us. We had some changes in our committee and a financial crisis. That was a testing time, when we could easily have given up, but I think we've come through that now. We're at the stage of expanding to have others in the staff, but we need some increase in our regular financial support to be able to expand the work. We're hoping some of this will come through churches in the London area who will begin to see this need as an area of responsibility. They're not doing anything to help the homosexuals, and they could perhaps support us financially and in prayer. We want to train churches to be more effective in helping homosexuals.

LIA: What's the biggest change you've seen in your own life through the ministry?

CM: How I've related to myself. Although when I first went to Martin's meetings, I hadn't been involved in a homosexual relationship for years, I tended to deal with the temptation by blocking it out. I kept a distance from other men, both emotionally and physically. I've learned to be more open, and that's something that has been important for me. Significant changes have begun in my relationship to my parents. My father has taken to hugging me when we meet, which is something he initiated. It's a small step, but God is working.

LIA: Any final words of advice to others in ministry?

CM: Don't do it alone. You need spiritual and emotional support by involvement in a Biblical church fellowship. You need accountability to others, whether it's based within your own church or in an interdenominational group. Be part of a committed church fellowship, and be accountable in terms of ministry.

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