Dear Mrs. Bohlin,

I wish to sincerely thank you for your article on the Littleton shootings. And for being such a broadminded person. As Eric Harris was, I am 18 years old, but I am female. My heart has been torn out by the Columbine massacre and beyond my control, it has been over Eric and Dylan. Never in my life have my sympathies rested with the 'criminals', whether it be for shop lifting or for murder. I don't see Eric or Dylan as criminals at all, they were victims, victims of a cruel, evil society.

I have been ostracized in my life, as I have been a victim of alienation. It is something that affects you emotionally like nothing else. The only thing worse than it, I have discovered, is when it happens to someone else and you did nothing to help them (even if you did live in different countries). The whole thing freaks me out so much because many of the things that I have heard Eric and Dylan felt, I felt. At the worst stages in 1995 and 1996, I felt like killing those who were victimising me. I visualised myself wearing black, pump action shot gun in hand, entering my school assembly hall one morning from a side entrance, while assembly was taking place. I ordered everyone off the stage and told all the year 7's and 12's to leave. Then I started shooting in my fantasy.

I also know what it is like to admire the "mentally unstable," those who stand up for what they believe in. Those with the courage to say "I can't take this anymore, and I won't."

Even now, though I no longer feel like that, I am still today, to some extent 'einen auschlander'.

Again, I sincerely thank you for not blaming violent movies or computers games, although I do not condone them. This world is the problem, and people have to start facing it.  
 

Thank you, thank you, thank you for honoring me by sharing your heart with me! I am so glad you sensed I was understanding and non-judgmental. I really do strive to be exactly that way.

You wouldn't believe how many other high schoolers have experienced the same kind of awful pain you did. Some of them wrote to me after reading my article. Some of them wrote letters to the editor of newspapers and news magazines here in the States. The ugly truth is surfacing, and it's time adults knew it: school is one of the most unsafe places to be in the WORLD!! Not just from guns and bombs, but even more--much more--from the cruel comments and actions of other students. And from teachers. The person who taught me about shame said that schools are one of the most shame-based institutions in the world. And adults are often clueless about how much horrible pain kids deal with every single day because of being ostracized and alienated like you were.

I am so very, very sorry you had to experience that. Truly.

I have a question for you, ________: did you allow it to do a good work in your soul? Did it make you sensitive to others, especially those being ignored and marginalized? Did it give you a tender heart toward those who are being victimized?

If it did, then you emerged the winner. Every time one of the people who mistreated you did the things they did to you, it made their character get a little smaller. Every single time. But if you allowed it to help you grow, then your character grew larger. And that's what the world needs to help change things.

Did you know that Jesus Christ experienced the exact same feelings of ostracization and alienation when He lived on earth? He knows just how you felt. He died on the cross for you to show you how much He loves you. (He did that to take the penalty for your sins. And you know a lot about how bad sin is, since you've suffered so much because of other people's sins!)

The Lord bless you and keep you.

Sue Bohlin
Probe Ministries  
 

Dear Sue,

Something in particular about Eric and Dylan has been bothering me for some time now and I was wondering if you'd be able to help me out. Although I am a Christian, some things about Christianity don't make sense to me. When people die the Bible tells us that we go to either heaven or hell. I can't understand why God would send Eric and Dylan to hell. Princess Diana was also an example. She went against one of the Ten Commandments when she committed adultery, but why would God send such a wonderful, loving, caring, peaceful person to hell?

God is forgiving and understanding, has he forgiven Eric and Dylan? Are they in heaven with God? Eric allegedly asked Cassie Bernall whether she believed in God and shot her when she replied yes. Would he have been sent to hell? How was he expected to believe in a God who seemingly did nothing to help him? God himself did not fail him, but society failed him, a society of people who God made in His image.

I believe that the life circumstances, the environment and those around us influence our ability to be Christian. How could Eric and Dylan be penalised because of their feelings and beliefs (or lack of beliefs)? Their situation moulded their feelings towards Christianity, it was not their fault. If things had been different for them, perhaps they would have been Christians. I do not believe that they determined their ability to be Christian, society and all those they came into contact with determined that for them.

I know that you probably don't know the answer, I don't think anyone does, but at times I feel a bit hypocritical for believing in something that I don't understand much of.

Although I am a Christian, some things about Christianity don't make sense to me.

That's OK, there is a lot of mystery in our faith, which makes sense--because God is such a big God and we have such small minds, that we are bound not to understand aspects of reality! Especially when we don't have all the information we need to understand some things.

When people die the Bible tells us that we go to either heaven or hell. I can't understand why God would send Eric and Dylan to hell. Princess Diana was also an example. She went against one of the Ten Commandments when she committed adultery, but why would God send such a wonderful, loving, caring, peaceful person to hell?

God doesn't send people to hell. We are born headed for hell, and that's where we'd ALL go, apart from the grace and mercy of God. The reason for that is that when Adam sinned in the Garden of Eden, he plunged all his descendants--that's ALL of us, except for the Lord Jesus--into a state of spiritual death. It's our "default" position, to use a computer term. We have to choose to move from death to life in order to change our destiny.

Lovely people like Princess Diana show a heart of love and compassion because they are made in the image of God, but those God-like qualities are not enough to overcome the sin problem. Here's an analogy. Let's say someone breaks into your home and kills your parents. Then they come back to you and say, "I want to be your friend. I'm good looking, I'm nice to have around when you have parties, and I can mow the grass for you." It doesn't matter what their good qualities are, they will never overcome the fact that they did something horrendous to you. Or let's say they come to you and say, "Sorry about your parents. Here's 5 dollars for you." You would feel insulted, wouldn't you?

Well, when we come to God as sinners with rebellious hearts, whether passively rebelling by ignoring Him, or actively rebelling by doing wrong and evil things, our "good" qualities or the things we do to make it up to him don't count for ANYTHING. After all, our sin required the death of His Son, right? Our sin is a BIG BIG problem!! There's nothing we can do to make up for it. That's why Jesus had to die; because sin is soooooo bad that it has to be paid for by death. And since God didn't want it to be OUR death, Jesus paid the penalty for our sins by HIS death. That's the whole point of Christianity, that's what sets it apart from all other religions. That, and the fact that the founder of our religion came back to life three days later to prove that He really is who He said He was--God!

So--back to Eric and Dylan and Princess Diana.

They were born headed for hell, and the only way for them to go to heaven was to trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, that He paid the penalty for their sins by His death on the cross. Are they in heaven? I don't know. I did hear that one of the Littleton guys (I can't remember which) went to a church coffeehouse a few weeks before the shootings where he heard the gospel, and I heard that Luis Palau, a world evangelist, sat next to Princess Di at a state dinner and shared the gospel with her, so at least two of them knew what they needed to know to have a personal relationship with Jesus and go to heaven. If they trusted Christ, I don't know.

However, I just heard on the radio the other day from one of the Littleton students who was hiding in a room on the other side of a door from where the shooters were talking to each other and shouting sometimes, and he said he could tell they were acting crazy and not like themselves, and he thought that they were demon possessed. Their behavior certainly SOUNDS like demon possession. And a demon cannot possess a Christian, because the Holy Spirit possesses us.

God is forgiving and understanding, has he forgiven Eric and Dylan? Are they in heaven with God?

He offered forgiveness to them while they were on earth. If they chose not to accept it by trusting Christ, then He couldn't force it on them. People who refuse God's forgiveness cannot have it, because it has to be received. It's like someone offering you a gift; it's not yours until you say "thank you" and take it and unwrap it. God offered His forgiveness to Eric and Dylan; if they refused it, they are without it forever. Have you ever taken an antibiotic or other medicine? If you are really sick, it can save and heal you, but not if you leave it in the bottle and refuse to take it into yourself. God's forgiveness is like that too. He honors our choices and will not force it on us.

Eric alledgedly asked Cassie Bernall whether she believed in God and shot her when she replied yes. Would he have been sent to hell?

Not for that. He would have gone to hell because of choosing to continue to go his own way, ignoring or rebelling against God.

How was he expected to believe in a God who seemingly did nothing to help him? God himself did not fail him, but society failed him, a society of people who God made in His image.

Romans 1 tells us that we are "without excuse" because God has made it plain to us through His creation that He exists. Eric and Dylan knew that God exists. God's help was there for them, but apparently they chose other routes apart from God. They were victims of being abused and mistreated, but they were NOT victims in how they chose to handle that pain. They chose an evil path, opening themselves up to Satan instead of trusting God with their pain like you did. I have received many e-mails about my article from people who experienced the same kind of treatment that Eric and Dylan did, but who never acted out revenge like they did. When they chose to strike back, they crossed the line from victim and became victimizers.

I believe that the life circumstances, the environment and those around us influence our ability to be Christian. How could Eric and Dylan be penalised because of their feelings and beliefs (or lack of beliefs)? Their situation moulded their feelings towards Christianity, it was not their fault.

Regardless of life circumstances and environment, every person is shown a degree of spiritual light for which we are responsible. (That's why people with mental retardation can and do become Christians!) Their "feelings" toward Christianity really don't matter any more than their "feelings" toward the law of gravity. What's true is true, especially when God has given you evidence all around you that it is true! They are without excuse. They knew better. They had other choices for handling their rage and pain. God says they are without excuse. It may sound cold, but it's the bare-bones reality. Jesus wept when they were wounded and mistreated, because He knew exactly what that feels like. He offered them comfort and peace, but they chose to ignore it.

If things had been different for them, perhaps they would have been Christians. I do not believe that they determined their ability to be Christian, society and all those they came into contact with determined that for them.

Sorry, ________, but that's not what the Word of God says. Our choices are not determined in that way. We are not animals! Because we are made in the image of God, because we are created with spirits that were made to be indwelled by God, every person has the ability to choose to turn to God or continue to turn away from Him. (Again, read Romans.) Even people who have never heard the gospel know that there is a God to whom they are accountable, and God holds them accountable for what knowledge of Him they DO have.

I know that you probably don't know the answer, I don't think anyone does, but at times I feel a bit hypocritical for believing in something that I don't understand much of.

It's not hypocrisy to believe in something that's true even though you don't understand it! I believe in electricity, but I don't have a CLUE how it all works!! There ARE answers to your questions, both in the scriptures and in the writings of learned people who have studied the questions and the answers. God is bigger than our questions, and I personally am very encouraged and comforted by the fact that He will have answers for me in heaven, whatever He hasn't answered on earth.

In closing, God passionately and recklessly loved Eric and Dylan, and He showed His love to them. It would appear that they spurned it and chose to go their own path. Except that it wasn't really theirs: it was the path of death and destruction that Satan laid out for them, and they opened themselves up to him by their choices. God grieves for them, but because He wants our love, freely given, He could not force Himself on them, or anyone else. We have to choose Him. They apparently didn't, and that is the true tragedy.

I hope this helps.

Sue