My grandmother was an Orthodox Christian. When she came to Turkey many years ago, she became a believer of Jesus Christ and started to join a small Protestant church in Istanbul. My mother wasn't a believer until I grew up. My father was a Muslim from Bulgarian Turks.
For many years I didn't understand much about the Bible. From time to time with my grandmother I joined the Sunday Services, but it was not really speaking to me. My father teased us a lot with the Christian faith. This is the reason I didn't take the faith seriously. When I was 17 years old, I started to have a lot of psychological problems. My family took me to many doctors. But I didn't receive an answer for my problem. God really started to work in my heart through this problem.
One day I was sitting hopeless at home. Some ladies from church visited me. They started to talk about Jesus. Even though I had heard about Jesus, this time something really hit me in the deepest part of my heart.
Still I was so doubtful to say yes to Jesus as my Savior and Lord. I was really afraid to give control of my life to somebody. I thought he really wouldn't let me live my own life. Even though I was sick psychologically, still my hope was to live a free lifestyle without any limits.
After that day I really fought with myself. "I will never give up, I will never be directed by someone who I do not know". These were my words in opposition to Our Savior. But one day I lost all of my power to be opposed to Him, I started to cry and say "Yes, you are my Lord. I'm giving my life to you".
It was a kind of miracle, after that day my psychological problem started to lose power over me. Then I started to share about Jesus with my family, and my mother and cousins became believers after me. I began to see God's hand in my family. But still there was a problem. My father didn't like what happened to us. He put pressure on us. He forbade us to tell anyone about our new faith. Our neighbors and friends never knew us as Christians for a while. It wasn't good for our spiritual life. We couldn't even join church easily. Then I started to pray for a Christian husband. My mother and cousins had no hope for my prayer.
Meeting my husband was a second big miracle in my life. He was a pastor of the Turkish Protestant Church and also a Turk from Muslim background. Through our marriage, God made a lot of difference in my family. One of the most important things is that my father has joined our church services for the last one year and a half. He doesn't say he has converted, but from his seriousness in the service we can see how God has changed his heart.
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